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The games are actually being marketed horribly off-mark and are, in fact, an adaptation of the award-winning postmodern Russian novel “Numbers” by Victor Pelevin.
Your Pikachu or Eevee is actually a businessman obsessed with the number 34 (and terrified of the number 43) who looks like Pikachu or Eevee. He falls in love with a young woman who’s obsessed with Meowth to the point where she’s spiked her hair to look like Meowth’s whiskers pointing off the side of her head and even acts like a Meowth. She drags him into the world of Pokémon roleplay sex, and can’t get off unless he’s tasing her and making Pikachu sounds or she’s shoving something shaped like an evolutionary stone up his anal cavity while he makes Eevee sounds. The rest of the story just falls into more madness with happy terrorists, apocalyptic hobos, ancient Chinese wizards posing as Photoshop designers, evil rituals, bloody murder with a dildo, a Goldeen who turns into an amazing American superhero named “Queerman,” and Vladimir Putin in drag being obsessed with Rule 34 of Donkey from Shrek and raping the Pikachu or Eevee while making donkey sounds and monologuing about capitalism.
