Nowadays, I can't tell if people are joshing about suicide or not but I'll take the safe road and assume you aren't even though you probably are.
It's not worth it, dude. Trust me, I have been down this road, and my partner has too. I still struggle with suicidal thoughts a lot and it can be really hard to find a reason to keep living. But it's there.
One of my favorite professor's I've had (genetics) once told us that if you can't find something it's because it isn't there or you can't see it. Just because you can't see whatever silver lining is in your life doesn't mean it isn't there. It'll find its way to you in time.
Also, don't do pills. Unless you know what you're doing, DON'T do pills. You really have to understand the pills you're taking, the quantity, and how your body reacts to medication. For example, my body burns of meds quickly, so I had to collect a LOT of one of my prescription meds for it to be 100% likely. That and you also have to account for the side effects of the meds; how long would it take, what would the signs be, do I have to do it in a certain place for a certain time to make sure someone doesn't find me. Don't try ODing on anything over the counter. The worst you could do is probably just have permanent internal organ damage that'll kill you, but in a few years making life all the more miserable.
Your life and time spent on this stupid rock is worth too much to just throw it away after a measly 23 years.
tl;dr
don't be an idiot whose facebook page will be filled with comments from shitty "acquaintances" talking about how much they cared about you and loved you and how great you were
here's a song that I like to listen to when I'm really down. Dunno if you'll like it, but it helps me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3rsD4orsMFw>>32591448yeah ok sure
