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>be a little 10 year old boy about the get his first Pokémon in the Alola region
>I think that rowlet is cute because of it being round and fluffy
>"anon, it appears that your rowlet in the %12 percent gender ratio and is a female, you still want to take it?"
>meh, whatever
>you two immediately get along and start sweeping teams across alola and snuggle up with eachother every night
>"what? Rowlet is evolving!"
>"Congratulations, your rowlet evolved into a dartrix!"
>immediately get distant after the evolution
>dartix constantly pays no attention to my command and always rolls her eyes whenever I talk to her about ANYTHING
>sadly, dartix evolves
>"congratulations, your dartix evolved into a decidueye!"
>immediately after evolution, decidueye gets on its knees and begs for forgiveness of her past evolution personality
>I of course forgive erik, this turned into the worst decision of my life
>I notice that decidueye now loves hanging in the trees
>it seems to have a constant eye on me, I can't seem to get a moment of privacy
>I was lucky enough to get through all trial captains and beat the league
>one fine day, I had noticed that decidueye is oddlying enough cuddling up against me rather than being up in the trees
>days go by which turn into weeks as she gets more all ND more closer to me, first starting off with just shoulder nozzles to basically hugging me the whole entire time I walk
>after 2 months of this misery, she suddenly wasn't anywhere in sight
>I started to worry, she would usually have been covering her wings over me by now
>I then hear a loud THUNK
>an arrow goes straight up my ass
>decidueye used spirit shackle on me
>"anon can no longer escape!"
>I find myself frozen from both the pain and the move
>decidueye proceeds to [WOOPS, CAN'T SHOE THAT IN A CHRISTIAN MANGA]
>I am now the sex slave of my decidueye
Moral of the story, don't get decidueye
