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>The two rocket launchers on Blastoise's shoulders turn into a single huge cannon when it Mega Evolves into Mega Blastoise. This cannon boasts a blast range so great that it can strike targets more than six miles away!
Six miles away? Christ.
If you got hit by that kind of force at close range, you'd be fucking dead. Your bones would be dust, your organs would be soup, and your body in general would be ripped to pieces.
Pokemon are fucking terrifying.