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i love this lil guy
I honestly don't even know to begin. I have a bunch of problems but I feel like they're all small parts of a bigger problem.
I don't think I'm phisically attracted to humans, either male or female. I'm not even sure if I can feel romantic attraction, either. I find "xeno" creatures (not just Pokémon, but the typical furry/scalie thing, etc.) very attractive, even very anthropomorphized ones, but changing the skin and face to human skin and a human face instantly makes me 100x less attracted.
Every time i've felt as if I were romantically attracted to a woman, in the end it just ended up being that I was attracted to the idea of being in love, but I was never in love to begin with. What's even worse is that I've started getting feelings for my best friend. I don't even know if they're actually genuine this time or my brain is playing tricks with me again. But if it were true, then it's never going to happen. While I have come to term with the fact that I'm probably bisexual, he's definitely straight (very catholic). I don't want to tell him anything because, I don't even know if I'm actually attracted, and even then, I don't want to ruin our friendship, I'm really grateful for it.
And even if I were to fall in love with another guy, what would I do with it? I'd like to have biological children (and the thought of impregnating anyone who isn't my partner disgusts me), and gay (anal) sex honestly disgusts me. Honestly, I find most kinds of sex disgusting and repulsive, the only type I can even begin to tolerate is straight PiV.
In general, I'm extremely disgusted by the human body. Furry/scalie/whatever creatures are majestic and beautiful (and even then, to a certain point. "Suggestive" porn is much more arousing than actually "explicit" porn.), but human bodies (naked, that is) are just frankly disgusting. The only one I don't find disgusting is mine because I'm so used to it.
I don't think I'll ever feel the touch of a woman.
