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Still not even done, but I think it's much much better than before. I need a new font for the name though. Gill Sans isn't cutting it. Of all the Gill Sans, that was the only one that was as close as I could get, and even then it looks horrid.
Also, I'm not going to bother with the flavor text. "oh no!" Yeah. Flavor text is really complex based off length and number of characters to determine font size and such. I think the way I have it now is fine though.