>>34440632Get your freeloading ass off my sofa, you fucking failure. Christ, my Slaking does more around this house than you. It can only use one move every two turns, it's only able to say its name and it's morbidly obese and it STILL does more for this household than you. What, am I being punished? Arceus, did you send me this piece of shit candy-ass for a son because I didn't pray to you enough?
I knew I shouldn't have left you here with your mother. All she ever did was spoil you, and now you're just a weak, flabby punk who couldn't battle his way out of a bug-type gym! When I was your age, I had eight badges and an entire team of fully-evolved Pokemon. Look at your Mudkip: how the fuck is it still a Mudkip?!
You're the biggest mistake I ever made. Why the fuck am I even talking to you?
