>>12468563You say, "Okay then a house is clearly worse than an onion so give me the latter."
They're like, "Okay then here is your onion."
The zombie ghost pirate rapist construction workers give you a copy of *The* Onion.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I CANNOT EAT THIS WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME!?"
The construction workers laugh, "HAHAHAHAHAH CHRISTMAS IS OURS!"
They turn into demon reindeer zombie ghost pirate rapist construction workers, destroy your house with their laser red noses, and then disappear like that.
"I HAVE LOST AND FAILED TO PROTECT THE SWAMP WHY DIDN'T I CHOSE THE HOUSE?"
You have not success.
A) Cry.
B) Wipe The Onion with your ass.
C) Commit sudoku.
