>>57777109I read Reunianon's "Cloak and Dagger" (and drew something inspired by it).
>https://rentry.org/cc3reuniI think this chapter has good character writing and some nice scenes. The part with Beth and Totodile drinking was funny, Toge seemed to be written well overall, and the part where Al and Beth hang out on the building was a pleasant scene that demonstrated their relationship well. Also, I'm interested to see where Al's supernatural nightmare goes.
As for criticism, I feel like Al brushed off his seizure too quickly, and Team Misfits' dumbfounded response to him asking "what's a jannie?" felt weird--not every human knows 4chan lingo, so it shouldn't be such a shocker that this guy doesn't understand the joke. Also, I don't get why Beth is already spilling the beans that she and Al aren't humans. She says it's only necessary to deceive specific people, and not everyone needs to fall for it, but why is she going out of her way to reveal the truth to random people? That just increases the risk that it'll reach the ears of those she wants to fool. Regardless, I think there's potential for this concept, and I appreciate how you show not everyone is falling for their deception, considering how flimsy it is.
I also read "Team Bucket Brigade and the Quest for the Holy Pail".
>https://rentry.org/skytowerbucketI enjoyed this entry. It's written well overall. I like this new serious side of Ruby's character, and I'm curious to learn more about her backstory (also, her heirloom sounds awesome). The ending felt abrupt, like it's missing details to explain what Shirley means, so hopefully that's covered in the next part.
Also, I love how you incorporated that one meme into the story, kek
yaay pelleds 