When I decided to play Black I didn't know or think much of it when starting.
When it came to choosing my starter, for some reason, I felt I wanted to build a sort of romantic relationship between a female one and its male trainer.
For this I reset the game constantly until I found a female starter of my choice.
After that I usually imagined both of them fucking during their long journey. I shortly began to imagine myself in place of that trainer.
After finally completing the game I needed to make a trade, and for that I needed to reproduce my starter.
My partner being fucked by another Pokemon, while I knowingly waited, was a deep sting I had to constantly endure.
When the produced egg itself was finally hatching I felt incredibly affected; I was deeply disturbed, betrayed and distressed.
I refused to accept this and instead just shut the game down without saving, as if the hatching and mating never happened.
Immediately after that moment I realized I had crossed a major line since long ago. I had to stop everything completely and re-think with what I was actually doing with myself. Since then, some 2 years ago, I never switched the game on again nor played any other Pokemon game. I was 19 years old.
How fucking immature and pathetic am I?
