>anon is sitting at home, listening to music, when the telltale footsteps of the fatass mailman are heard from outside the basement window
>anon ascends the stairs, peeks out the door and sees box in mailbox
>rushes to mailbox, rips open packaging, retrieves charizard
>turns to leave, charizard clutched tightly against their chest as they nervous dart up the gravel pathway
>one shaking hand reaches for the doorknob, the other clinging to the charizard figurine for dear life above the stone steps
>entering the house, anon kicks off his shoes, only to recoil in horror as a single loose pebble flies out of their shoe, arcing to the wall and bouncing off ineffectually
>after freezing in place for several minutes, the threat is gone, and anon's grip on charizard slowly weakens as they tip-toe back to the basement
>heart hammering in their chest as their eyes shoot between the thick granite walls of the basement, they finally make it back to their computer, gingerly brushing off a nearby table and very, very slowly lowering the charizard atop it
>sweating profusely and out of breath but finally triumphant, anon slowly leans back in their computer chair, sighing in relief and turning back to the screen to post about the successful journey on /vp/
>as soon as the computer comes out of sleep mode, a horrible, terrifying realization hits anon, and they lunge for the volume control on the speakers
>but its too late; the shitty rock music they had been listening to prior to the mail delivery resumes in full force, and as the first note rings out in the stuffy, sweaty-smelling basement, the charizard statue breaks into tens of pieces, each tumbling onto the floor and instantly turning to dust on contact with the cold stone ground
>anon never gets their 70$ back
