>>17470049no, i should know better than to question people about that, especially when you're so guilty about it. muh autism isn't an excuse.
but i think that it's a good sign that you feel guilty about it. it means that you're much less likely to ever do it again. people make mistakes and do dumb things when they're young - kinda like what i did literally two minutes ago. some people never do things like that, others do things far worse than that.
i'd try my best to not dwell on it too much. it happened, and there's nothing you can do about it, but it was a learning experience for you and you definitely don't think it was a good idea in hindsight.
again, while i don't condone it or think it was a good thing, and while i don't really know you, i'd say that you don't seem like a bad person. you just did something pretty bad when you were younger. easier said than done, to be sure, but try to leave it in the past as much as possible; it's easy to tell that you're not like that, and you shouldn't continue to blame yourself for that or label yourself as that kind of person when it seems to be an exception more than a pattern.
you're better than that now, anon. don't hold yourself to the past; it means you inhibit yourself in the future as well.
