Be /vp/, /lgbt/, /fa/, /pol/, and very rarely /mu/.
Minding my own business while participating in the giveaway thread (still giving away timid great bull Numels growth, iron head, heat wave, ancient power, disc up and reply. Anyway, get trade invite. Some kid showing his shones. I show him my shones.

I'll trade you my shones rioly if you can beat me 6v6.

Battle. He is absolute shit. Friend request. Rebattle:
> Waaah, stop using healing moves
Sorry bro, part of the game.
> Can I retry?
Sure, as much as you like.

How old are you?
> 9
Wow, I'm over 10 years older than you. You're pretty good for 9 (no, he is shit)

Over a few more battles, I give him pointers about his team, tell him about smogon, and give him (one of my spare) shiny geodude as a consolation prize.

Did I do well /vp/? I'm not used to talking to children. I told him to rematch me anytime.
ITT: Awkward battle/trade convos with yourself and children.