So it seems like Gamefreak REALLY fucked up this time.

Pichu can't evolve in ORAS. Try it for yourself. Even with max. happiness nothing happens.
No, it is not holding an Everstone. Yes, the woman in Verdanturf Town says "It’s extremely friendly toward you. It couldn’t possibly love you more. It’s a pleasure to see!"

I just traded it over to X, maxed out the happiness there by biking around in Lumiouse and it evolved.

You had one job, Gamefreak.