>Gen VII games are announced, Pokémon Pink and Brown

-32 new pokémon, including 11 legendaries and the starters
-No more abilities, Evs/IVs or physical/special split because this is too complicated
-After seeing shinies everywhere in GTS, GF concluded they were too easy to get and made the encounter rate 1/300000, with no way to increase it
-Exp share from gen VI returns, and is NOT optional
-Megas for all pokémon except Flygon
-No need for mega stones anymore
-You can't get pokémon from previous gen before you've beaten the elite 4, though NPC trainers may
-All HMs from previous games return except Fly, for a total of 10, TMs are back to single use
-The games take places around New Orleans, to keep it realistic the region is almost completely submerged
-The local team actually has a sensible goal, which is the fight against poképhilia
-To achieve their goal they proceed to rape the pokémon of all the trainers in order to destroy the world
-Your rival is actually romanceable, Ze is of unidentified gender due to the pokérus ze caught. Ze also has a healing pokémon with hir, available at all time, including battles.
-Champion’s team is: 2 FEAR mons, megafun-bro, lagging tail/assist liepard and smeargle
-Postgame has the battle frontier, with updated OU smogon rules and teams
- and a hour long cutscene during which all legends from previous gens join you

Do people buy it? Does /vp/ defend it?