>>22798963>DoduoI used to know a couple like this. They're split up now.
>QwilfishYou can eat Qwilfish, but it’s pretty dangerous. Same with Tyranitar, but for different reasons.
>HypnoHypno get a load of bad press, but they’re real nice guys. Can’t hold their liquor, though.
>SpindaThis kid I used to know swore he saw a Spinda with a dick on it. He was full of it.
>StarmieHonestly, I can’t really remember anything about Starmie. I’m having a rough day, really.
>MachopYou’re a good kid, you know that? I know it’s corny, but I feel like I don’t say it enough.
>JynxI used to know a girl like that. She was sweet on the inside, though.
>HoothootIf you can figure out how many feet it’s got, let me know. It’s a god damn mystery.
>UnownIn France, these things have accents on them. Kind of just makes them look angry, though.
>ArbokSupposedly the pattern changes from region to region, but I think we all know that’s BS.
>ParasYou can eat those mushrooms, but it’d be kind of a dick move. It’s your call, I guess.
>SlowpokeThese used to be pretty popular, but they’ve gone out of fashion now. Maybe you could bring it back?
>SlowbroThis is technically two Pokémon, but it only counts as one. I know, I know, we got gypped.
>BaltoyMy mom had one when I was a kid, but I dropped it and it broke. I still feel bad about that.
>OctilleryAn Octillery gets eaten in this one horror film. It’s at Blockbuster, but it’s R-rated. Maybe in a few years.
>SlowkingI feel like Slowking’s on my wavelength. You wouldn’t get it, you’re too young.
>SudowoodoI was a tree in the school play. I hated it, but this guy loves it. Different strokes, I guess.
>AzurillThese things sometimes change gender when they evolve. It’s not my place to comment.
>MedititeMy girlfriend wants me to do yoga. You still need to meet her, you should come over some time.
>MachampTaking its belt off would be a bad idea. That applies to most angry, ripped dudes, really.
