Fuck, I'm late
God fucking damn it, what's with all the people obsessed with Gardevoir? When I was in college, I had a roommate. Dude was fat, smelly, and obsessed with Gardevoir. He had Gardevoir t-shirts, Gardevoir posters, a Gardevoir plushie, and, I swear to God, he had a Gardevoir body pillow. Every fucking conversation we had, he turned it into a Gardervoir conversation. I wanted to punch him so bad, but I couldn't. I have anger issues, and fucking up just once could get me out of college. But honestly, sometimes I thought I'd gladly pay that price for punching that fat motherfucker in the face. I kept finding Gardevoir pictures EVERYWHERE. Some of them were covered in dry cum. Every night I heard him jerking off, and no matter how many times I asked him to stop - he did it anyway.
One time he said to me: "Hey Anon, we are having Pokémon night this Friday, are you cool with that?" I had an all night LAN party that Friday, so I allowed that, but only if his buddies wouldn't touch any of my stuff.
Long story short - LAN party got cancelled, and I had to go back to my room. What I saw could not be described. Four pasty fat nerds, watching the Pokémon anime, eating Cheetos, and covering everything with orange dust. One of those fat fucks wore a fucking Gardevoir suit and another one was smoking. And they were sitting on my bed. That's right, those fuckers were sitting on my fucking bed, covering it in Cheetos dust, cigarette ash and sweat. They didn't notice me, because they were too busy watching the anime. I was about to scream bloody murder and punch them, when Gardevoir appeared on the screen. All four pulled their dicks out in one synchronised motion and started to masturbate. I wish I was making this up. Even today it comes back to haunt me in my dreams.
I gave my roomate a concussion, knocked a few teeth out of the others, and shattered suit guy's kneecap. Got into serious trouble, but my lawyer pulled my ass out of the fire. I fucking hate Gardevoir.
