You speculate for weeks building up to the Superbowl. The day comes, and you plop down in front of the TV you've come to find yourself using less and less. You don't give jack shit about the two teams, and you watch before hand just in case.
The game begins, and you watch half-assedly. Whenever the game is actually on, you take breaks to piss or get more junk food, hearing bullshit words like "tight-end" waft to you from the speakers. But you're always glued to the screen for the commercials, damn straight. There are a shit-ton of beer commercials. During one of the breaks you count the ratio, and three out of five are for beer (well, one was for Baccardi, but that's close enough to count.)
You check the clock, and it is 56 minutes into this wretched heap of normiedom. Another break comes on. Miller's Lite. Frat boys are running through a garden maze on all fours like dogs, trying to get to the cooler of Miller's Lite. GoDaddy. A blonde bimbo does a strip tease, culminating in her holding a tablet over her breasts that reads "FIRST YEAR ONLY $19.99." You unconsciously sigh. At least there won't be another sappy, vaguely-feminist tampon commercial like there was a break or two ago. Sheesh.
A pokeball opens from a dark blue (black?) background. A CG Charizard roars. "POKEMON ARE BACK. NOW ON YOUR IPHONE OR ANDROID DEVICE!" You see Pokemon running, you think you make out a Flaaffy and a Poliwhirl. A Greninja shoots water. A Volcanion roars against lava eruptions.
You check /vp/. You scroll past the Phox Phriday thread (on Sunday) and see a thread of your companions complaining. You join them until an anon links a Youtube video of the commercial on the official channel. You rewatch it for some kind of hidden clue or symbol. Nothing.
You scroll down. There is a commenter named Jason Hardwick who has an avatar of Fluttershy. "Lol, nobody watching the Super bowl cares about Pokemon!", he says. It has two likes. He ain't wrong.
