Why did this lewd shitters not get a unique (shit) Ability?

It doesn't even get a rare one it gets one of the most common and generally useful in the fucking game?

Is this a reverse Greninja scenario? But instead of getting a new broken meme ability it gets an old reliable whilst the other two get gimmick shit.

My autism can't accept this. Either they should have all gotten old abilities (Sniper and Serene Grace) or they all should have gotten new ones.

(Distant reeeeeeeing)