>Get major promotion in my office two weeks ago
>Decide to splurge and buy a 3DS and Sun on a whim
>Haven't played a Pokèmon game in about a decade
>Always pick the Water starter
>Get excited when I see Popplio
>Thinking Walrein or Water/Dark clown
>Evolves in a few days into a little girl with a seal flavor named Brianna or something
>Check the gender--it's a boy
>Okay, whatever, it's just the awkward second form
>Just evolved into Primemarina
>It's a grotesque half woman with jewelry, long hair, and make up/ half sea lion
>Still a boy
>Check online to see if it has alternate forms
>Grass has an anthropomorphic furry cartoon owl archer and fire gets an anthropomorphic furry cartoon tiger wrestler

Lesson learned: don't go into Pokèmon games unspoiled. I wish I chose the owl although they're all really childish. Boxed the seal.

Help me, /vp/. Is there a story on why Popplio isn't 87% female? Is it the designated transsexual representative for the franchise? Has Pokemon gone SJW?

Also what's with a lot of the new Pokémon being just things with faces? Sand castle with a face, hula necklace with a face, anchor with a face, etc.