>Take bus to GameStop, having preordered Assasin's Creed: Origins (God's Edition, it was the best deal for my needs despite the theist title)
>Walk inside, being careful not to catch my cape in the door
>See that another portion of the store has been converted into selling t-shirts to normalfag scum
>Tsk softly to myself and shake my head before heading to the Funko Pops section
>Figure I might find something to add to my impressive collection and make the trip worth my time
>A kid and his MILF have already taken up a good amount of space in the Funko aisle
>No room for my impressive girth
>Try to shuffle closer to the collectables
>The boy's mother looks at me
>Oh god, those eyes
>Blue as the sky
>And I've dated women with children before, maybe I could even school him in proper vidya (right now he was holding a Tracer Pop, lel shit taste in waifus)
>Realize I've been staring
>Shit
>The boy's mother takes her son's hand and asks, "Can I help you?"
>Start to reflexively mumble "M-milkys..." before she starts leading him away
>"Come on Jimmy, we still have to pick up your Pokeyman code"
>Realize the Shiny Silvally event must have started
>Z-Form Engaged
>Push the vile temptress and her spawn out of the way, having realized her presence in the store was only a test to distract me from my TRUE and HONEST soulmate not a furry though
>Beat them to the register, first in line
>Cashier is some greasy looking beta nerd
>Force him to hand me all of the remaining Silvally codes with my alpha presence
>May have also threatened him with my katana, my memory gets fuzzy when I'm Z-powered up
>Head for the door, but not before locking eyes with the fluid druid once again
>Too alpha to care, but turn to her son
>Hand him one of my Silvally code cards
>Look him dead in the eyes and tell him "Tracer a shit"
>Run out of store
>Forget to watch my cape and get it stuck
>Fall down
>Realize I forgot to pick up my preorder
FUCKING gamestop
