Domain changed to archive.palanq.win . Feb 14-25 still awaits import.
[17 / 2 / ?]

Hau

No.35521400 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
>be me, 11 yo
>new kid moves down the block
>comes from Kanto
>fucking kanto: the place that brought in these fucking invasive rats and oil spills.
>My grandad wants me to be nice to him and shit
>Whatever, I do it for him because I don't like fighting people
>The dude's a dick.
>Meet this 7/10, nice, really fucking pale, but cute
>has a space fart pokemon in her bag
>It's actually oddly cute
>She immediately has eyes for kantocock
>tfisthisshit.exe
>challenge (((kantocock))) to a battle
>He beats me cause he chose the pokemon that was SA against mine, like a dick.
>Fucking cat, can you believe it?
>Whatever.jpg
>I go off and train my pokemon
>On my way, I see a doughnut shop or some shit
>called malasadas
>have one
>almost jizz my pants it's good as fuck
>first sexual experience as an 11yo
>tfw
>flashforward a couple days
>he already has a team full of fucking lv50 mons
>All designed to counter the e4 and me
>THIS IS MY FUCKING CHANCE
>Fight him
>he has a baracat
>Sweeps my team
>not because it's even fucking good, but because it's fucking lv 63 and all of mine are lv 40
>Leaves, holding back tears
>Drowns my sorrows in orgasmic doughnuts
>don't even taste good, they all taste like failure
>Decide to fuck up his shit
>Get some Salazzle pheromones ready
>Put them in a bottle
>Goes over to his house to fuck his mom
>Door's already open
>tooeasy.png
>Walk in
>Kantocock's balls deep in 7/10 in the middle of the fucking living room
>he turns to look at me with that smile that never fucking changes
>7/10 is screaming with pleasure on the ground, begging for him to make her his slut
>Send out raichu to add a little electro overstimulation
>Raichu used thunderbolt!
>He sends out Marrowak
>fucking lightning rod
>he throws a piece of mail at me
>"Good game."
>"Good luck catching up!"
>"Bitch"
>Goes over to main square
>starts reffing a rap battle between two gang members
>mfw I have never left that spot
>mfw I'm still reffing