>>36910189they treat you bad, you make an excuse instead of standing up to them or leaving. You minimize, you shift the blame to yourself, or temporary circumstances, or internal struggles.
But it just. keeps. happening.
No amount of leeway or enabling is enough to help them stabilize and become that person you always hoped they would become, because no amount of leeway or enabling was ever warranted. They're just shitty people taking advantage of you.
When you finally do try to leave they'll get desperate. They may start repeating some of the very excuses you made for them, or start apologizing profusely, or start acting out, even getting angry and violent or begin to threaten. Stay safe but don't give in an inch. They don't want to shape up, they just want to keep you under their thumb, keep their favorite plaything safely under their control, and any tactic that facilitates they they're going to use. They may not even actually want you, they're just a child moping or throwing a tantrum because something was taken away from them.
Stand up to your abuser. Leave. Never come back. True in relationships. True in jobs. True with companies.
