*ahem*
"Mic test, mic test, 1 2 3!"
*cough*
*the shuffling of feet*
"Is this thing on?"
*distant baby crying*
"Mhm... Hello gentlemen. How are you doing?"
*clapping*
"What a nice Wednesday morning...""
*cough*
"Well... I'm here today to say two things..."
"..."
"FUCK GEN ONE!"
*roaring applause, whistling, and screaming*
"But most importantly..."
"..."
"FUCK. TRANNIES. FUCK JANNIES."
"Goodnight."
*standing ovation, mother and babies crying tears of joy*