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Cosmoem. It's useless, like Cosmog, but it also doesn't die as easily, which means it sometimes fails as death fodder and gives your opponent a free turn. It's also not as cute, which lowers the chance of your opponent forfeiting out of shame.
>actively guarantees a loss including it on your team?
None, you don't have to send out your shitmon and can just play 5v6.