*tap tap* Is this thing on? *TAP*

Good evening ladies and mon. Sure is a beautiful crowd out tonight. I just flew in from Kanto and boy are my wife's arms tired what with her being a swoobat and all. #JustFieldEggGroupThings

But you're all probably wondering why I called you all here tonight. Well for starters, I have a very important message that I would like to share with all of you...