/vp/ - Pokémon » Thread #42910154

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Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 00:54:53 No.42910154 View View Reply Original Report

Try your best to explain in a lore-friendly way why Alakazam are not the dominant species of the Pokemon Universe.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 00:55:15 No.42910157 Report

Quoted By:

tfw to intelligent

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 00:55:36 No.42910163 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
they can be caught in pokeballs
humans cant

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 00:55:43 No.42910164 Report

Quoted By: >>42910203 >>42910236

Pokedex entries are bullshit

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 00:57:13 No.42910177 Report

Quoted By:

>alakazam monarchy watches over its newly founded kingdom
>cloud passes overhead
>all alakazam are immediately killed by the resulting shadow

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 00:57:27 No.42910179 Report

Quoted By: >>42910196 >>42910247 >>42911287

humans are part dark-type and as such are immune to alakazam's bullshit

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 00:57:48 No.42910186 Report

Quoted By:

I never noticed how weird his feet were

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 00:58:28 No.42910196 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910179
kek

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 00:59:32 No.42910203 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910164
This. If Alakazam and other Pokemon were that intelligent they would have already attempted to form their own civilization. Also it's confirmed that Pokemon are predisposed to cohabitation and would prefer to strengthen themselves in battle rather than pursue other objectives.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:00:55 No.42910223 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
They simply don't have any desire to form large civilizations in the way humans do.

Having a couple of buddies is enough for them.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:02:40 No.42910236 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910164
/thread

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:03:18 No.42910244 Report

Quoted By:

They're so intelligent they know the best way to maintain dominance is to give the impression they aren't.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:03:17 No.42910245 Report

Quoted By:

They're so smart they're enlightened enough to not seek violence or some shit.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:03:22 No.42910247 Report

Quoted By: >>42910323

>>42910179
>dark-type
>human

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:07:00 No.42910282 Report

Quoted By: >>42914783

>>42910154
On the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than Alakazam because he had achieved so much—the wheel, Unova, wars and so on—whilst all the Alakazams had ever done was muck about in the grass having a good time. But conversely, the Alakazams had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:09:46 No.42910316 Report

Quoted By: >>42910390

>>42910154
Alakazams don't exist in the wild.
A Kadabra needs to be traded, which means that every Alakazam is already in the possession of a human.
Even if an Alakazam is released or breaks free, its offspring will never reach their true potential without human intervention, so they're better off with their symbiotic relationship with humans.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:10:16 No.42910323 Report

Quoted By: >>42910493 >>42910510 >>42910874 >>42913755

>>42910247
>white people are normal type
>blacks are dark
>Hispanics are poison
>Asians are psychic
>Australians are fighting
>Jews are fairy
>Arabs are ground

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:14:57 No.42910374 Report

Quoted By: >>42910523

>>42910154
The pokedex is written by children and Alakazam's IQ isn't actually 5000.
They're intelligent compared to other Pokemon, but probably aren't as smart as humans.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:16:16 No.42910390 Report

Quoted By: >>42910411 >>42910412

>>42910316
If Alakazams are so smart, why don't they just trade Kadabras to one another?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:18:47 No.42910411 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910390
The new alamazam would get pissed about its subordinate status. Also the ones that are able to facilitate trade have the power.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:18:52 No.42910412 Report

Quoted By: >>42911477

>>42910390
They need to be traded specifically by a human.
It doesn't work if a Pokemon does it because humans radiate some kind of bullshit magic energy that gives Pokemon more power.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:26:23 No.42910472 Report

Quoted By:

If Alakazam need to be traded, how did ancient Pokémopolis have them?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:27:38 No.42910487 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
short-lived form due to accelerated aging/weakn ess of body

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:28:44 No.42910493 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910323
Asians are bug

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:29:21 No.42910501 Report

Quoted By:

too busy jerking it to level 5 abras

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:30:22 No.42910510 Report

Quoted By: >>42910675 >>42911284

>>42910323
>Australians and whites separate
>Australians are fighting
Well, at least it explains their weakness to Flying types. As an Asian though I would suggest:

>Indians are Fire type
>Chinese are Bug type
>East Asians are Psychic type
>South East Asians are Fighting type; just group us with Australians
>Polynesians are Water type
>Scandinavians/Russians/Inuits are Ice type

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:32:17 No.42910523 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910374
Depending on the Pokemon you compare it to, it'd still probably be smarter than a human
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qp02wo28Syo

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:47:24 No.42910652 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
They simply don't want to, it's too much of a headache. Honestly i'd rather live as a dog or bird then as a human if i had the choice, being the dominant species sucks.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:49:57 No.42910675 Report

Quoted By: >>42910686

>>42910510
White people are psychic
Blacks are dark

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:51:34 No.42910686 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910675
>white people are psychic
Is that why Blacks and Asians beat them at everything?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:53:17 No.42910701 Report

Quoted By: >>42910721 >>42910788

It’s the same reason autistics irl don’t take over the world. They have no ability to direct their raw computational power toward something useful/self-interested under their own volition so they just move stuff with their mind, teleport around and play with spoons.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 01:55:08 No.42910721 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910701
delet this it's too personal

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:00:42 No.42910782 Report

Quoted By:

They're smart enough to realize that unlimited power is ultimately self-defeating.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:01:22 No.42910788 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910701
There's actually an episode of the original Star Trek where a highly advanced race of super intelligent beings merely sat around and indulged their own senses using their god like ability to influence the minds of themselves and others. Their personal development had no prebuilt natural desire for exploration, as the surface of their world was destroyed leaving nothing to find. They merely sat underground and studied what they found fascinated, taking subjects to studied. They would their zoo subjects to experience their greatest fantasies as compensation using their mental powers. This is in contrast to humans who set out to explore new worlds at a much earlier stage of development.

My point is perhaps these are the Alakazam and that's why the Pokemon universe is so great. It's all an illusion by the Alakazam as they study the humans as pets.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:04:29 No.42910814 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
Pokeballs are mind-altering devices

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:09:26 No.42910851 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
Sweet Abra cunny.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:10:15 No.42910864 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
You only perceive the world as they allow it to be perceived. For all you know, they are the dominant lifeform.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:10:43 No.42910874 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910323
>Tfw Dark/Fairy

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:52:40 No.42911201 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
>powerful consciousnesses don't want to dominate other people, they want to empower them so they don't tend to get together
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sUIcCyPOA30

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:57:40 No.42911236 Report

Quoted By:

They rule the world, but force psychic illusion that they don't.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:58:13 No.42911241 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
well mew's and mewtwo's exist so they wouldn't anyway, also arceus and her babies

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:59:23 No.42911249 Report

Quoted By: >>42911251 >>42911257 >>42914283

>>42910154
Gardevoir can create black holes
Why aren't their attacking stats on par with legendaries?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 02:59:57 No.42911251 Report

Quoted By: >>42911260

>>42911249
why is her leg angry

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 03:00:30 No.42911257 Report

Quoted By:

>>42911249
i want to stick my wenis in her black hole

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 03:00:57 No.42911260 Report

Quoted By:

>>42911251
Skipped leg day because they just float around all the time and now has to deal with keeping its owner grounded during fucking gravity fluctuations

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 03:03:32 No.42911281 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
Because they can't keep the bugs out of their asses.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 03:03:40 No.42911284 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910510
stfu seanigger

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 03:04:03 No.42911287 Report

Quoted By: >>42913391

>>42910154
>>42910154
>>42910154
Being a dominant species is lame as fuck when you can just chill in a pokeball all day and get free food from 10 year old girls.

>>42910179
Based and soulspilled.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 03:23:39 No.42911477 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910412
You need poke balls to do it. Thus to be an Alaskazam you need to give up your independence to someone else to evolve.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 04:12:59 No.42911952 Report

Quoted By:

>IQ testing in the Pokémon world has a large scaling system. 5000 IQ is the equivalent to 5 IQ in this world
>Alakazam are so intelligent, they have reached peak enlightenment to realise that being a retarded dominant species who constantly create problems for themselves and constantly fear over being taken over is a shitty lifestyle
>Alakazam have a 5000 IQ, but due to sleeping for most of their early lives, they are extremely lazy to bother trying to take over

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 04:35:06 No.42912147 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
Niggers are dark type

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 04:57:40 No.42912282 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
Humans have the cliche "stronger than they appear" bullshit. Like Bea being able to do push ups with the same weight a Machoke is doing but faster and have no muscle.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 05:03:16 No.42912322 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
>Free food
>Free shelter
>Free healthcare
>All you have to do it battle
>Trade evo so a majority come from trade

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 05:04:24 No.42912334 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
It might have 5000 iq but that doesn't mean it has any ambitions. Probably doesn't have any issue participating and cockfights and chilling in the forest.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 05:07:48 No.42912356 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
Alakazam are the Jews of the Pokeverse.
They hide their positions of power, when they are the ones pulling the strings.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 05:10:47 No.42912385 Report

Quoted By:

there isnt enough of them

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 05:11:10 No.42912389 Report

Quoted By: >>42913201

>super intelligent but lacking free will like a genie
>super intelligent but with an inbuilt drive to serve humans like an AI
>super intelligent but "blue and orange morality", not fitting the drives that a human would follow if they were that smart, following machinations that only they can figure out
>super intelligent but with the issues raised in horse destroys the universe, where if you give a horse more processing power does that just make it smarter at doing horse things? that high iq might just be applied to doing pokemon things in the smartest possible way.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 07:20:12 No.42913201 Report

Quoted By: >>42913258

>>42912389
the horse destroys the universe argument is the best i've seen by far

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 07:27:06 No.42913258 Report

Quoted By: >>42913274

>>42913201
I don't get it, explain

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 07:29:58 No.42913274 Report

Quoted By: >>42913287 >>42913841

>>42913258
in the book the argument is that is you gave a horse massive quantities of processing power it's not necessarily going to suddenly care about writing symphonies and solving equations, the extra processing power might just make it be 'more horse' and use those resources for better grass acquiring, mating, and herd dynamics, the same way if you gave a cat identifying neural net a lot more processing power it is just going to get better at identifying cats, not start questioning why it's there. a Pokemon given colossal mental power may simply be better at doing pokemon things.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 07:32:48 No.42913287 Report

Quoted By: >>42913425 >>42913474

>>42913274
But what are "Pokémon things."? Pokémon and humans were once equal beings. Why did they diverge so drastically?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 07:53:25 No.42913391 Report

Quoted By:

>>42911287
>free food
>Foodin

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 08:01:11 No.42913425 Report

Quoted By:

>>42913287
All life on Earth came from a common ancestor, what's your point?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 08:10:50 No.42913474 Report

Quoted By:

>>42913287
fighting, surviving, and evolving i guess. perhaps pokemon and humans once being equal speaks more of the advancement of humans since then than it does of pokemon falling somehow. there must have been a time in the pokemon world where primitive humans were only concerned with tribal warfare and survival.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 09:30:46 No.42913755 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910323
>Italians are fire type because AYYY DATS A SPICY-A MEATBALL
>T

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 09:53:49 No.42913841 Report

Quoted By: >>42913877

>>42913274
>you gave a horse massive quantities of processing power it's not necessarily going to suddenly care about writing symphonies and solving equations, the extra processing power might just make it be 'more horse' and use those resources for better grass acquiring, mating, and herd dynamics
But then how come humans care about writing symphonies and solving equations instead of just doing primate things in the smartest possible way.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 10:00:55 No.42913877 Report

Quoted By:

>>42913841
i think that is what humans do really, the closest primates are good pattern spotters and communicator. pokemon don't have the basis of language like primates do , though depending on what the mon is you might end up with one with an intelligence focused on making music and art, if you upgraded a smeargle or something. what's the specialisation of an abra which would be exaggerated?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 10:04:56 No.42913891 Report

Quoted By:

Pokémon belong to nature and society goes against nature.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 12:13:33 No.42914283 Report

Quoted By:

>>42911249
>why aren't their attacking stats on par with legendaries
>when 28 (possibly 30) of 52 known legendaries have a base stat of 125 or less in either attacking stat, counting normally encountered forms (Incarnate Forces, though Tornadus meets the criteria in Therian Forme as well; Zygarde-50%, although 10% and Complete also meet the criteria; Eternatus doesn't count despite its Eternamax form having Atk and SpA at or below 125)

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 12:14:44 No.42914289 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
They know its best to teamup with human for full potential

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 13:32:56 No.42914597 Report

Quoted By:

Because humans bullied those nerds and won

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 13:39:43 No.42914633 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910154
Wild Alakazam don’t exist. They are Pokémon created through human influence, and their latent ultimate abilities can only be unlocked through strong bonds with said humans

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 29 Feb 2020 14:11:59 No.42914783 Report

Quoted By:

>>42910282
So the true Earth overlords are ratattas.

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