Hey guys. It's been awhile. I hope you haven't forgotten that your waifu would hate you, you disgusting piece of shit, you. Be she human or Pokémon, she would be so thoroughly disgusted by your noxious presence that the only possible course of action would be to run from you in panic.

Really, the only thing you can do is kill yourself. It's the quickest and most sensible option. You don't want your waifu to suffer, right? You want her to be happy? Do it.