>>44959750I was actually 11 when I went to boarding school.
desu, I wish my family didnt visit me once every week.
they were personally responsible for me not opening up to others and clinging on them every week instead.
And when they went away, I clinged onto my DS, which i actually wasnt allowed to have but I hid it anyway.
I remember one week, they didnt come. They told me on the phone earlier they couldnt come that week to see me.
So I had two long weeks with no parents visiting me, just going to classes, football and whatever jungle activities the other kids did in their free time.
Those two weeks were actually the most thrilling. I became closer with my roomate, and the other kids, because i had a hole in my chest of not seeing mum and dad at the end of the week.
I felt a lot closer to everyone and I got more productive and felt more comfortable in class once I got through that hard time.
I then recessed once my parents overcompensated, and took mid-week visits, even though they werent allowed, and they also started sneaking me out, which also wasnt allowed, to watch a movie with them in the city nearby, returning before sleep time.
It was all a coping mechanism with the depressing life of boarding school.
They shouldve just left me. Sure, I wouldve been bullied, I wouldve cried, but I would take any solace or comfort of other people I got. I would feel affection and closer to those who supported me.
Instead I complained the whole year, never made real friends and couldnt wait to leave this dump.
Even today, as I live with my family, I cant make new friends as easily as I did in those two weeks they didnt see me. and Ive never felt more dead and can handle loneliness as easy as i can breath, or as they call it, solitude.
I wish loneliness hurt as badly as it did then, but it doesnt. I just learned how to live with it.
