>>47827994the board room is dark. down the table, several figures sit in chairs, barely visible from thin streaks of light filtering past the half-shuttered windows. a figure at the end of the table leans forward, revealing himself as his head comes to a stop in a sunbeam.
"We have a problem." Junichi Masuda says in perfect English, his fingers steepled over his mouth. "The western pigs are starting to catch on." To this, several of the figures stirred in shock.
"Mr. Masuda, how can this be? Swoshi sold in record numbers!" He protested. Masuda holds up a hand and halts the protest.
"My men on the Continent hear rumblings from the idiot foreigners. The way we come on top is to crush them, but not directly. We have always done this to our competitors, and now only we are left. This won't change." Masuda presses a button on the table and a screen lowers from the ceiling to face him. A camera winks on it's recording light. The screen bursts to life, and reveals a naked white male sweatily copulating with a Celebi body pillow. An uncomfortable silence passes until Joe Merrick looks up, and sees Masuda staring intently at him. Merrick gasps, tumbling off his bed and clawing a shirt over him to look somewhat presentable.
"M-Mr. Masuda! This is a surprise!" Merrick stammers, trying to turn his computer camera away from the sweat-stained pillow behind him. Masuda's stoic face regards him for a moment, then breaks into a goofy smile.
"MISTAH MERRIKU, I HEER DAT THE PEEPOL ARE NOT VELY HAPPI WITH POKKETU MONSTAH. I BERIEVE WE HAD AN AGLEEMENT?" He shouts, allowing a vein in his head to visibly throb.
Merrick is visibly shaken. "S-Sir, I've done everything I can to--"
"EVLETHING, MISTAH MERRIKU?"
"...Y-yes!"
"HOW DISAPPOINTING. IF DAT IS THE BEST YOU CAN DO FOR GAMUFREEK I MUST FIND SOMEONE ERSE TO KEEP POKEMON MASTER DREAMS ALIVE IN THE CHILRREN"
Joe's eyes widened in abject horror. "No! Please! Give me time!" he protested,
