>>48135807I think I've got some sociopathic traits, my therapist thinks so, too. I've just come back from my appointment 30 minutes ago, and she's talked me out of getting a medical diagnosis for the work benefits because she knows that I'll inevitably regret it if it hurts my family in the long run.
To me, the suicide thing is by far the most messed up thing I've done, largely because I planned it for a week and I meant to hurt those people, I wanted to. The people I didn't want to hurt were my family, and I regret every second of worry I caused them over it.
I can remember how my Mom didn't leave my bedside until I was asleep the entire time I was in the hospital, and seeing my Dad cry for the first time in my life. I hate myself for it, but I live my life to prove I'm okay and that they don't need to worry about me anymore.
>>48136534I know you're saying that because you only know me from these snippets that I've shared. I can assure you, I do not revel in any of the hurt I've caused anyone, even the people I hated at the time. Ultimately, this is a confession thread, so I shared things I've done that I feel bad about, things I regret.
I go to a therapist every week to try and figure out how to either make amends where possible, or how to stop myself from doing something similar again because I don't want to hurt anyone anymore. I know I'll never be normal. but I want to minimize the impact my problems may have on other people.
