>"you're probably wondering how I ended up here. I ask myself the same question everyday. The year was 94 or— fuck it, was it 93? I can't remember this shit. *takes a heavy sip of whiskey*

'96, it is. Two weeks before the release date we hear a knock. Tajiri, some nerd with a mullet from some Tokyo university walked around like a dog by some shady suit called Iwata, knocks on GameFreak's door to ask where the fuck is the Pokéman game they hired us to make or whatever. Back in those days I had been snorting cocain like the plant was going extinct, could barely bring myself to open the door. That was when fucking Ishihara thought it was the whore we had hired and opened the door, allowing those two to bust in.

The suit Iwata dude was clearly pissed. First thing he does is to fucking knock the cocain table over while telling the Tajiri guy to 'check the code' — which at the point was a 62 lines Wordpad archive called 'New Document'. I couldn't give a fuck. At that point I'm high out of my mind, trying to do not punch some dude telling me 'that as long as he's alive I'm not directing shit again, not even a children's play'. I swear I was about to get back in my senses and kill the fucker.

Sadly the Tajiri guy was back before I started having violent withdrawals. Turns out it's another asshole, calls the shitty music I made in an afternoon 'shit that he'll have to ghost compose'. At that point I'm about to throw these dudes off the window because it was not my fault they got scammed by some unknown dev Ishihara and I made up to pay the loanshark.

That is when I commited the worst of my life.