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Showderp: The Banning of Anon edition

No.52294897 View ViewReplyOriginalReport
Champ and Finchinator lived alone in a small house on a hill.
Champ kept to himself, making memes and playing with his Pokemon, as Finchinator watched Smogon broadcasts on the television.
Life was simple, and they were both happy. That was, until the day Finchinator heard a voice from above.
“Your metagame has become corrupted by offense. It needs to be saved.”
“I will do my best to save it, Landorus,” Finchinator replied, rushing into Champ's room, removing all that beat stall from his life.
Again the voice called to Finch, "OU's health is still corrupt. It needs to be cut off from all that is offensive in this world, and return to stall."
“I will follow your instructions, Landorus. I have faith in thee,” Finchinator replied, as he shadowbanned Champ from the chat, away from the retarded oppos of the world.
One last time, Finchinator heard the voice of Landorus calling to him.
“You've done as I've asked, but I still question your devotion to me. To prove your faith, I will ask one more thing of you."
"Yes Landorus, anything!” Finchinator begged.
"To prove your love and devotion, I require a sacrifice. The /vp/ poster, Champ, will be this sacrifice. Go into his room, and ban him from Showdown, as an offering to me to prove you love me above all else."
"Yes Landorus", he replied, grabbing Toxapex's Pokeball from his bag.
Champ, watching through a crack in his door, trembled in fear.
Scrambling around his room to find a hiding place, he noticed a trap door to Dogars hidden under his rug.
Without hesitation, he flung open the hatch, just as Finchinator burst through his door, and threw himself down into the unknown depths below.
>Rules Card
https://pastebin.com/WXTE84X9
>Basement
play.dogars.org
>Monster Manuel
dogars.org
>Glowing Hourglass
>>52273586