I drove this franchise nose first into the ground, taught you to have lower expectation of videogames and life and ruined your childhood. I did it all not out of incompetence, but out of conviction. I am the ultimate proof that mediocrity sells, and that branding is all that matters. I am the ultimate proof that you will buy it anyway, no matter if it is a stool I just dumped in the toilet and slapped a Pikachu on it.

I did all of this and my reward is a phony retirement, working 1 hour a week in TPC while earning ten times more after I had proven my point with BDSP.

I broke you as a child and made you weaker as an adult. I made this world an objectively worse place and caused irreparable damage to this franchise.

Now kneel to me.