WHAAAAAAT?! WE’RE BUYING ANOTHER POKÉMON GAME THAT’S SO BROKEN IT CRASHES BEFORE THE TITLE SCREEN, AND IT’S ALREADY SOLD A BILLION COPIES?!?! THE GRAPHICS ARE SO BAD MY EYES ARE BLEEDING, THE FRAME RATE’S SO SLOW IT’S COUNTING SECONDS IN DOG YEARS, AND THE NPCs ARE GLITCHING INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION, BUT WE’RE STILL THROWING CASH AT GAME FREAK LIKE THEY’RE HANDING OUT MASTER BALLS?!?! AND YOU'RE SAYING I'L BUY IT ANYWAY?! THE STORY’S SO WEAK IT’S JUST THREE LINES OF TEXT, THE BATTLES FREEZE EVERY TURN, AND THE NEW MEGAS LOOK LIKE THEY COULD BE SVRIBBLES DONE MY MY WIFE'S 8 YEAR OLD SON, YET WE’RE ALL SCREAMING “I NEED IT NOW”?!?! GAME FREAK COULD SELL US A BLANK DISC WITH “POKÉMON” YELLED INTO A MICROPHONE AND WE’D PRE-ORDER IT FOR A HUNDRED BUCKS?! AND WHAAAAAAT?! THE PATCHES BREAK MORE THAN THEY FIX?! THE BUGS ARE NOW A FEATURE?! JOE MERRICK TOLD US WR SHOULD EMBRACE THEM AND LE THEM ENTER OUR BODY TO MAKE A NEST IN OUR ASSHOLES?? ALL WHILE SWITCH IS SCREAMING, SMOKING, BEGGING TO BE SHUT OFF, AND WE’RE CALLING THIS GARBAGE “SOUL”?!?! THIS ISN’T A GAME, IT’S A KEKOLDERY! WHAT A SIGHT TO SORE EYE! AND NOW YOU’RE SAYING THE NEXT RELEASE IS JUST A BLACK SCREEN WITH A JIGGLYPUFF LAUGHING AT MY PAIN?! AND I’LL BUY IT?! I’LL CAMP OUT FOR THE DELUXE EDITION AND TATTOO THE ERROR CODE ON MY FOREHEAD?! I’M TRAPPED IN A TIME CHAMBER OF LAG AND LOYALTY! AND WHAAAAAAAT? XERNEAS AND YVELTAL, THE BOX POKEMON OF X AND Y ARE LOCKED BEHIND A 30 DOLLARS DLC WITH THE POST GAMES BEHIND IT??! AND YOU'LL HAVE ́E BUY IT WITHOUT SEEING EVEN ONE SECOND OF GAMEPLAY!!! YABBA DABBA DOO!!!!!!!!!!