>>58843064I like the details of the contract work, but you honestly lost me with the details and the debugging process – and I'm saying this as a programmer. I'm in favour of keeping it, but a few more allegories wouldn't hurt. Make us *feel* the frustrating debugging process, you know? I want to feel angry at the developer too!
>[...] leaning back to look up at the ceiling. The pockmarks in the ceiling were [...]Double mention of ceiling reads weird.
>5th paragraphI had to read the sentence with the headphone jack three times to understand it. Dunno if its just my mind refusing to work or if that sentence could be split up for a better flow.
>Last paragraphPoor elephant indeed...
It was a nice addition to loosen up the tension from debugging.
>producing Raichu rubberThey're producing what?
>electrocuting it to deathI've yet to see someone survive an electrocution.
"to death" can be removed, as electrocute already means "to kill with electricity".
>>58844070Hey, our Milkeon with the keeper gf is back!
And she immediately proofs to us again that she is, in fact, a keeper gf. Very wholesome read—good job, Anon!
>>58845821Cursed image...
Interesting that she checks for retrograde PIPS first, instead of the more immediate danger of anterograde PIPS. I do like the approach with the questions though, however the questionnaire would be standardised for a scoring like this. It doesn't really feel like a scientific thing to do – way too open ended. But I'm neither a doctor, nor a therapist, so fuck if I know.
I guess it could be a help for situations like here, without actual medical merit, but just to help freshly turned people get a quick sanity check before they take the real test/examination at an actual facility.