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I feel for you anon, I would have been on the same position as you 2 months ago but after I managed to make love with my girlfriend(virgin) of 3 years, things started to change for me... I was freed from the incel mindset and a new me was born.
The first thing that I noticed was everything's seemed a little bit brighter it's like the snyder filter in me disappeared and replaced by disney's.
I also tend to be a bit more forgiving towards kikes, sodomites, women, sand niggers, sea niggers, zhang niggers, spic niggers and regular niggers.
The new me is affectionate, empathetic and diverse.
I don't regret having sex, this is what I wanted, my salvation, the sex haver.
