>>31538280Oh, yay! Let's take a look then.
>Tsukinode EmpireHaving a compound word, especially one that's a proper noun, be read with the kun'yomi reading is whack. But I take it you just wanted to get "Tsukino" in there, so eh, it's acceptable. You can pretty much claim that kanji is read however you want anyways. My actual criticism here is that "Empire" shouldn't be in English. That just sounds strange. It should be either "Tsukino Teikoku" or, if you want to go very hard on the Japan-ness, "Tsukino Koukoku." Teikoku is the general Japanese word for empire, consisting of the characters for "emperor" and "nation," while koukoku is the word for specifically the Empire of Japan, using the character for "divine" instead of emperor.
>many gaijin and banzoku fail to realize its importanceAh, I see you're going for a sort of superiority complex with the nation! This is kind of a weird mix of words here, "banzoku" is typically used to refer to specific barbarian tribes and not just "barbarians" in general. You'd want to use "yabanjin" instead, which have the "savage/uncivilized" meaning I think you were actually going for. "Gaijin" is also pretty neutral, which could be the intent, but if you instead wanted to really hammer in how much your Empire thinks outsiders are beneath them, I'd use "ijin" instead. It's an extremely derogatory way of referring to foreigners. Do not use it in real life.
>ShùzìLiterally number people...beautiful.
Looking good so far, aside from some typos. Keep it up! Have the two of you begun to put thought into how you will differentiate yourselves from one another?
>>31538425My thoughts on the legal system were very similar to yours, so that sounds great!
>I always like the Holy Kingdom as an image of brutality and rigid structureI agree! Due to their fanatical adherence to their faith, I've always imagined the Holy Kingdom as pretty totalitarian. The Kindred likely have this image of themselves as being benevolent and accepting, and it's one outsiders might wholeheartedly believe. To an extent, in the border towns where the Church's influence might not be as strong due to the higher ups holing up near Akuma Castle, it might even be true, but I figure the deeper in you go the more it turns it it's actually kind of a shitty place to live despite the citizens all insisting they're perfectly happy and everything is great. Does this sound about right to you?
