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I fucked up (I think?) and ended up finding out my oshi has a boyfriend (I think it may be a husband, based on what he's saying) by cross searching some things she said on stream.
I'm not an unicorn, so I thought I wouldn't mind if she had someone irl, but finding out she has been lying to us and hiding stuff from us has killed all the excitement I had for her, and kinda for the industry as a whole. I feel I irreparably broke something that gave me so much enjoyment for the last 14 months by searching something I wasn't meant to search; but I don't regret it at all and I feel extremely relieved all the hunches I had were right, which in turn makes me feel more guilty about finding it.
She doesn't know I know, and I don't think neither she nor the community would really notice if I left, but I still find the whole ordeal to be kinda depressing and disappointing.
