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Me. I understand what you mean.
I started with Holo content slightly before the 1st live, and I have always enjoyed the non-idol stuff. Gaming streams, talk streams, weird stuff streams, those are what's fun and what drew me to Hololive. The idol stuff did not interest me.
I tried going for the lives, and the last 2 have been disappointing for me. Not the content, the content was top tier for the people I like. The logistics, the crowd, the merch, the location, they are not great. I keep having the feeling that I am in the wrong crowd, I am in the wrong place.
I love a lot of the Holo peeps, but sometimes I do wish they aren't putting so much effort into these idol stuff, these singing, dancing, and parasocial fanservice stuff.