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not even real drama, just terminally online people cooking up lore in real time like they were fiending for something to cancel between genshin patches
so first she liked this random tweet saying vtubers who barely stream shouldn’t be getting model upgrades. twitter instantly decided it was a sub at some indie girl who dipped since christmas. huge stretch, but nope—instant callout threads. “the real lumi is showing herself,” like she probably hit like while half-asleep scrolling in bed
then someone pulls a galaxy brain move and says she’s working with some ai corp to replace small chuubas with bots that sound like them. no receipts. just a blurry discord screenshot with the name redacted like that makes it more convincing. people actually believed it. “she’s selling voices to silicon valley.” my guy, she plays valorant and yells at her chat
then she made a joke in a collab about vtweeters being allergic to obs. which, fair. but the chronically offended squad kicked into gear. some dude made a whole sad piano edit video essay like she ran over a cat on stream
someone else tried to cancel her for “stealing” a fan-made outfit, except the fan literally said “yeah i made this for her and told her she could use it.” didn’t matter. still got the “exploiting artists” discourse like it was 2016 tumblr all over again
and the kicker? she said mob psycho 100 wasn’t really her thing. and suddenly twitter acted like she pissed on the pope. “she hates animation,” “has no respect for narrative,” “shouldn’t have opinions.” over an anime take. completely unhinged
and it keeps going. like two days later she tweets “thinking abt getting a pet snail” and somehow this becomes a metaphor for her “slow upload schedule.” ppl in the replies like “wow so u do know you’re lazy.” girl can’t even express mollusk-based curiosity without catching strays
then there was the weird arc where someone made a fake AI-generated clip of her saying “i hate 2views” in the most uncanny valley voice ever—sounded like siri having a stroke—but ppl ran with it like it was a leaked call. thread w/ timestamps, a 40-min twitlonger called “the truth about lumi’s contempt,” and some guy in her mentions writing poems about betrayal. yeeyee ass nigga got bars and brainworms
next day she logs in and posts “hey i stubbed my toe” and like clockwork someone goes “must be karma for all the small creators you’ve crushed” ???
and then someone dropped a chart—yes a full-on data viz—claiming her stream times correlate with another vtuber’s burnout. like “notice how yuki’s hiatus started right when lumi went on that 5-day apex binge?” like that’s a war crime now? my brother in pixels, vtubers do not have butterfly effect powers
oh and god forbid she gets a new outfit again—people already pre-mad, saying “if she debuts w/ cat ears after liking that one tweet in december we’ll know.” know what. there is no lore. you are hallucinating drama like your lives depend on it
some guy made a 3D render of her being put on trial in a fake vr courtroom, as like, protest art. the judge was her vtuber friend harunaki. the jury was 12 ai-generated “cancelled” vtubers like ebiebi_projekt and honeybloomzEN. her lawyer was literally just a png of a dorito. it had 60k views in a day
anyway she went live the next day like nothing happened and she still just goes live like “sup chat, i brought iced coffee, sang some goofy songs, and hit chat with a “lol y’all good?” absolute giganigga move internet really is just high school with pngs
