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I keep trying to say how I feel but I keep deleting it because it sounds too faggy.
Fourth try: I know it's dumb and she is just a streamer using an avatar, but I actually felt something for her and I haven't felt anything like this for another human for years. And I know this yab is most likely nothing but still the feeling I had is gone. I'm back to feeling nothing. I will keep watching and supporting her because it would be unfair to her if I stopped because as I said this yab is most likely nothing. But still I wish this did not happen.