>>2604720I've never really had an oshi. I would hop from one girl to the next. Matsuri, Fubuki, Korone, Towa, Roboco, Mio. I'd lie to myself that they were my oshi in threads, but deep down I was a fraud. Then Ollie debuted, and that magical spark happened. I was a zomrade day 1. I would defend Ollie ferociously in every thread, and would fuck up my sleep schedule to watch her streams. I had no romantic feelings for her, but I did see her as something of a little sister. I would superchat her whenever I could, and was excited for the day her membership could become a thing. As far as I was concerned, Ollie was perfect. Ollie is perfect. Every girl should strive to be Ollie. It didn't matter if she never knew I existed, as long as she was happy it was fine. She felt so genuine, like a true fan of Hololive that loved everything about being a Vtuber, and it felt like she was going to really be a big influence on improving Hololive for the better. Then one day, it's like everything fell apart.
It genuinely bothered me about how hard Ollie was trying to 'change' everything, and how she talked to zomrades. Her loudness, her constant 'clip' baiting, the lewd jokes, the pandering to her zoomer audience, it really just started to get too fucking much. Then she started talking about "Hololive being too strict" and how "She was going to change that". Why would she want to change the thing she loves so much in such a terrible way, the thing that she was even a fan of at one point? Does she not realise what makes Hololive amazing? Maybe she does care for Hololive, but not enough that she's willing to try and break the rules so she could use her newfound fanbase and status to meet her own oshis and fufill her own agenda. It really infuriated me, and it started to bother me more when I realised I was 'supporting' her change.
Maybe I'm just a retarded schizo, but I felt lied to. I don't make Ollie hate threads. I don't spam her chat. I've blocked her, unsubscribed and I simply just avoid her. But Ollie, I genuinely feel betrayed and frustrated with her behaviour. I feel guilty of it, and gross, but I just can't bring myself to enjoy her.