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I don't envy vtubers, especially those who wear their hearts on their sleeve (like my oshi). Sure, acting out a character and playing games on stream is more fun than many other jobs. But they are dealing with hundreds of people, all coming at you from different places in life and wanting different things from you. All with a different level of empathy (or lack thereof) for your own feelings. I'm not even talking about haters. It takes one misguided fan, an actual fan who just happened to be more "ironic" in their enjoyment of your streams, to post a message that will make you spiral into self-doubt and self-worth issues and depression.
In short, vtubers are emotional workers, and it's a job that takes a toll on your mental health. Have you told your oshi how much she means to you, today?