>>62338804This certainly has the bones of a military / world conflict esc story, but I can't help but feel like it might benefit from more of the world state or factions being presented to the reader at a high level. There are clearly too sides presented, but without any background on the country and whatnot, it might be hard to hook people. For literary feedback, I might say to be more mindful of word re-usage, the wordhippo site posted by another anon is a great tool to help with this. What you have isn't bad by any means, but it would probably feel great with some variety in the vocabulary to spruce it up a little going forward.
For an actual question on the content. How did Botan manage to file a report on what happened if she was out cold for two days?
>Risu jobbed againI'll just have to give the tree rat Ws myself! You forced my hand so just you wait probably 6-7 months or more!
