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Been thinking of oshihen recently, not because of any particular current events but just a buildup of disdain for Nerissa's attitude and personality. I still really love her and want to see her succeed no matter what but it feels as she just hasn't gotten any better mentality-wise since she joined Hololive, and if a sexcation with your friend where you no doubt talked about some personal stuff isn't enough to fix you, then nothing is going to fix you.
Hololive needs more musically oriented talents who want to focus primarily on releasing songs, covers etc. and that's why I support her but to what extent can one person clearly just not like streaming before it interferes with their image? To what extent can they suck the life out of collabs before it becomes apparent that they just don't mesh well with anyone (except her family)? How many two hour streams in a row can anyone take before it feels like they're just there to be complained at?
This isn't even mentioning the karaoke, because it legitimately makes me both sad and mad. She has such a beautiful voice that works great in both casual and professional settings but she's so far up her ass (and so in her mind) that she can't even enjoy singing! A singer who can't enjoy singing! What the fuck do you like doing then woman?! She clearly had enough passion to put in the work to get her voice to where it is today, she clearly has to practice continuously throughout the week to sustain it, how the FUCK can you not spare even one DAY to please jailbird and have fun with karaoke? I have had actual dreams where I imagine there's a karaoke stream on the schedule, you know how fucking dire it has to be to get this bad?
I love her and my utmost wish is that one day she wakes up and actually enjoys doing streams, karaoke, collabs. That she can finally fix that small-minded mentality of hers and get over that inferiority complex so that she can focus on enjoying her time in Hololive as a singer instead of just yearning for more and more validation. But it's probably never going to happen at this point.
I'll wait until the album/EP comes out and judge if the tradeoff is worth it. There's no one to oshihen to anyway in EN and I haven't done my JP reps. I've only ever had two oshis ever anyway so it feels weird to change pre-graduation. My next choice is actually Mint but it just feels strange watching primarily Hololive streams and events while having an indie oshi. I hope EN5 debuts someone I like so I don't feel compelled to haunt /ope/ like the anti.
Sorry for the blogpost I just felt kinda sad. Thank you for reading, /ope/. Please continue loving Nerissa Ravencroft.
