>>23762737I am SICK and TIRED of fucking TOMATOES. They MOCK me by merely EXISTING.
Ever had a burger and felt 'hmm, there's something off about this'? It's the tomato. In 90% of cases it's the tomato. If you put a slice of tomato on a burger, it messes with it. The consistency and the taste are ruined. If you're going to put vegetables/fruit on a burger, you put onions on. Maybe pickle/gherkin. I had McDonalds recently and decided to go for something different. It was a burger with a tomato on, and my god did it suck. It was terrible, the tomato completely ruined the whole thing. I took it off and tried to enjoy it, but it wasn't the same. Those sickly juices corrupted the sacred trinity of meat, cheese, and savoury vegetable. The day after that I made burgers at home, just to confirm my disgust. And you know what? I was right. They were good tomatoes too, but they sucked ass in a burger. They ruined yet another meal for me. If you think tomatoes in burgers are good, you deserve the rope.
Tomatoes in salads are okay, but they're not something I'd go out of my way to eat. There are plenty of better options, although I can understand why you'd eat something like that. A caprese salad is, if you're really hungry, a good time. But would I take almost any other meal? Hell yeah I would, ya fucking jabroni.
Moving onto sauces, some are okay. Tomato-based pasta sauces, pizza sauces, the like. Those are good, keep it up tomatoes you're doing a wonderful job. BUT (and it's a big but), FUCK KETCHUP. It's the nastiest, most repulsive sauce out there. I will never understand these k*tchup people, they willingly eat filth. It hastes horrible, why not just use any other sauce? Why not just go without? If I'm having a burger I'll probably have either no sauce or use mustard, horseradish or something like that
(butter is pretty nice on a burger bun dayo). If I'm having fish and chips, I eat that shit with tartar or brown sauce. If I'm eating chicken, BBQ usually hits the spot. You know what I don't think of when I think of nice things to go with my food? A red-tinted vomit substitute. The degenerate tomato fetish of the West has gone much too far. Keep your disgusting tomatoes and tomato derivatives far away from me and my oshi, thank you.
I hope you enjoyed my blogpost, we need more nasfa/ck/.
