Quoted By:
Another day another true bill
Quick case again today. Some Spicette No-Habla got plastered and was crossing the lines on a public highway, and with a license that had been suspended a few days prior for the same reason. Quick case, officer and DMV sheboon gave testimony as only evidence. Our distinctly Brahmin-looking-and-named ADA for the day didn't even bother showing us bodycam footage for some reason.
Only interesting thing was that the language for one of the charges was so fucking jewishly convoluted that the ADA had to spend an extra 20 minutes or so rereading and explaining the text of the statute. I only vaguely understood what it meant, but I'm confident I would've been able to piece it together had I seen the statute on paper. Might have even asked to see it + the bodycam had the accused not just been another brown invader.
After the vote went through on all charges and we were officially off the record, the ADA asked if this was our first time hearing such a charge, and told us:
>I'm so sorry...
And in a moment that I'm rather pleased with myself over, I replied by saying, in a proud, firm and well-projected voice:
>I feel like we just got a crash course in Yiddish.
... to which almost all of the other grand jurors responded with that knowing, "oh ho ho, that's dangerous (but also I agree)" kind of laughter even the obese millennial woman with literal pride colors on her purse, surprisingly. As the ADA just smirked and silently looked down at his desk.
All in all a good day. How are you today chumbies?
>tl;dr drunk driving latinx bitch charged, law was very jewishly written, I made a joke about how jewish it was and did my part to help normalize nooticing