>>10705658I wanted a girl who hated me. I wanted a girl who would stare at me in disgust knowing I was a pervert. I wanted a girl who would tell me to go and kill myself for thinking of her sexually. I wanted a girl who would cover up her boobs and admonish the concept of a porn tag because she didn't want to think about the idea of others seeing her sexually. I wanted a girl who would hate the idea of having gachikois and would secretly throw up in disgust everytime she thought about people obsessing over her sexually or romantically. I wanted a girl who wished everyone who ever got into into a parasocial relationship would just neck themselves.
Instead I got a girl who cares about me. I got a girl who tells me to go to sleep and watch the VOD later. I got a girl who doesn't mind that people like her and does things like say 'ara ara' and do a loli voice live. I got a girl who constantly worries about her friends and her audience, and what they think of her. I got a girl who wants me to love her even if she grows old and ugly. I got a girl who has self-esteem and image issues, but genuinely cares about the people around them and wishes them the best even if perhaps at her own expense.
Why? Why did God do this to me?
Ooohhh, Ouro Kronii! Why do you torture me so?! Why can't you be cruel to me and break my heart? Noooooooo!!!!