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Sometimes I get lost in the moment and happen upon an image of rushia's model somewhere, which through the year and a half of watching her somewhat trained my brain to feel happy when I see her. Then I remember that she's gone. It's always the same feeling like somebody stabbed me in the gut, an emptiness in my core, and it hasn't got any better in these 6 months. Will it ever? I think that's a rhetorical question.
